Chip for tithing

“We prayed and felt a peace about it” Randy, CFO
Great to see that Crockett’s Bluff Community Church are really praying their way thru Revelation 13 as they implement their techno-tithing strategy. Said 27 year old homemaker Allison, “I was really shocked, like, ‘is my pastor Nicolae Carpathia or something?’ But when Pastor Bud told us our contributions were still tax deductible, I was reassured.”
The Skinny on tithing implants? When your pastor wants to slip a chip under your skin, its time to find another church. Serious.
Wait. the story gets worse . . . read more about “no chip no donut” and to see if the story is true or false…

From Holy Observer: “What may not be a laughing matter to some newcomers at CBCC is the foyer fellowship policy. In the church’s official welcome brochure, Visitors Pastor Hugh Dowd makes it clear that if you are not chipped, you cannot partake in post-service coffee and donuts. “There is a flipside however,” said Dowd. “Once chipped, you not only get food and fellowship, but you also get a ten percent discount at our bookstore/Starbucks for a year.”

somebody please tell me that this is a leftover joke from April 1!

Thanks Marc, who makes it into Friday Fax this week.


Andrew Jones has been blogging since 1997. He is based in San Francisco with his two daughters but also travels the globe to find compelling stories of early stage entrepreneurs changing their world. Sometimes he talks in the third person. Sometimes he even talks to himself and has been heard uttering the name "Precious" :-)


  • Holy Observer is a satire site, so it’s not a true story. But who knows, it might have inspired some ideas. The world is a strange place.

  • Hi Andrew, I thought the story was true for a moment myself. On my weblog ( I just posted an entry on the Mondex Hoax (biochip).
    It does make an interesting point though, what if it was true? How weird are we to actually think, for a moment, it is true, what does that say about the state of the contemporary Church?

  • It’s kinda funny that Crockett’s Bluff, AK doesn’t even exist. There is however a Crockett’s Bluff, AR. I pointed this out to them and they replied telling me that they have been to C B, AK. If anything, this whole story is a crock.
    [Andrew] hi AJ – thanks. Yes, it is a crock, but a funny one. These guys have a few of them (extreme communion (skydiving) was another.

  • This story is entirely fraudulent. I have amply researched all of these details since reading the first report. Crockett’s Bluff has no such church, it is a very small town, and the claim of “tithes” being collected via mandatory microchip implantation is ludicrous and simply not happening anywhere in America, at least, not yet.

Leave a Reply