I am my own Jailer

(I wrote this yesterday on the train between Frankfurt and Dresden)

________________

up

wards

struggling

calling softly

so that no one will hear

my voiceless cry for freedom

i am my own jailer

i have locked myself

in a prison of goals

and have thrown the key

beyond reach

like the expectations

that cuff my wrists

I would eagle glide

if I found the gusts of wind

to lift me tiptoe

to tilt me onto downward slope

with seagull swoop

with fred astair slide

with peter pan joy

i am my own junk-collector

an iron monger

who buys but never sells

heavy trinkets

and shackles

that rattle out

the jingles

of my self-promises

and pathetic chants

for someOne

to buy me

out

i

limp

under

the load

i have sold myself

but i would skip

if someone traded

my funnels for a filter

my anchors for air

i would jump

with antelope stride

with ballet grace

with michael jordan float

with bungee whoosh

if someOne

would trade

my tonnage for training wheels

that hold my lean

a tow rope to forwards nudge

a yoke to govern

the pace of peaceful paths

a rhythm recorded

by Another

less driven

than i

i am the master than throws the stick and

i am the dog that fetches it

i am my own fagan and

i am a hundred oliver twists

i am my own gravedigger

and i am the first volunteer

to fill the hole

when the mourners

have left

I would trade my

backyard of broken projects

for an empty field

with buried pearl

of promise

that there is an easy way

a wind to fill my back

eagles wings

to raise me

floating

down

ward

s

_________________________

I Am My Own Jailer,

by Andrew Jones

Notes:

The phrase “calling softly so no one will hear” is inspired by a similar phrase from Dylan Thomas.

This poetic prayer, if i can call it that, is a response to the encouraging words given to me by the 4-Square people in Germany, a few of them saying that God wants me to glide like an eagle, and that i should not work so hard but take it easy.

Good words. Good advice. May God hear my prayer and remember me.

Andrew Jones, Jan 30th, 2003

Andrew

Andrew Jones has been blogging since 1997. He is based in San Francisco with his two daughters but also travels the globe to find compelling stories of early stage entrepreneurs changing their world. Sometimes he talks in the third person. Sometimes he even talks to himself and has been heard uttering the name “Precious” :-)

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